Dave Gee: Life from Right Field

An Australian TV programme has given two advertising agencies the job of creating a mock campaign to promote an Invasion of New Zealand.

It's something many Aussies would probably quite like to see, if they could be persuaded of a decent reason for achieving a military win over the tiny Pacific islands of Nu Zullind.

The two clips have been created for Australia's ABC television show The Gruen Transfer, for a weekly slot called "The Pitch", which challenges two ad agencies to try and "sell the unsellable".

The 30-second clip from the top Marmalade agency tries to win support for a military invasion of New Zealand with the carrot of gaining a new public holiday.

The commercial suggests this Saturday is as good a day as any for the start of the war, which is likely to be "over by lunchtime, and to celebrate the whole country gets Monday off!"

Australia's 303 agency meanwhile plays up New Zealand's "100% Pure" campaign, with lush green mountains, crisp white snow slopes, swimming with dolphins, and clean beaches.

Those images are contrasted with the fact that New Zealand also has "0% Army, 0% Navy, and 0% Infantry", making the little country "100% there for the taking"!

Unfortunately the commercials are only "mock ads", but I wonder whether it might spark some serious thought by Australians of taking over their poorly-spoken south-eastern neighbours.

I look forward to the day when New Zealand becomes the 7th State of Australia, although I think I'd like to adopt the US dollar as well, rather than the Aussie $ or a combo-currency ;-)

* The Gruen Transfer - The Pitch... Which agency's ad convinces us more that we need to invade New Zealand?